These holiday visits are not going like I'd hoped. I was really looking forward to seeing my extended family who fly in for the holidays and had expected us to carry on as usual with our family traditions and fun. However, it's clear that my terminal illness is weighing heavily on their minds and it's changed the whole dynamic.
I feel like I'm starring in one of those Hallmark holiday movies. You know the ones. They're usually inoffensive fluff that's good for when you want to unwind and can't be bothered to think too much. So, I'm the leading lady, but instead of having a good-looking fella as my costar and a jealous ex as my antagonist, I'm stuck sharing the spotlight with dialysis and kidney failure. The whole story line actually revolves around my health! I'm getting lots of concerned looks thrown my way and extra tight hugs as though this could be the last time they get to hug me before I croak. I guess my expectation that nothing would change from previous holidays was unreasonable, but I sure wish I could change the channel because this plot is dull.